After giving out a long angry speech about my brother's failure to finish the paper work that is required of him, his need to keep changing jobs thinking that he is finding better ones when he is actually trying to avoid the piles unfinished business, the need for him to become more responsible (righ....t look who's talking) and deal with his impulsivity, it hit me!!
It is not the first time to pay attention to my own ADD, may be I have the inattentive or the overfocused type I believe. The piles of files that are accumulated on my brother's desk are pretty similar to the piles of books that I buy every year and never read and the number of days that passed by since I last brought myself to read the bible.
As I am starting to read "Reaching for the invisible God", trying hard to find Him, I am realizing that may be I am the one who is invisible as I continue to wander in my own mind for hours. What I need to restore my relationship with God is not the prayers of hundreds of believers to move the hardened heart (let me rather say the numbed) but it is a personal journey out of impulsivity and immediate gratifications. I need to try to do the impossible....lead a balanced life style!
I thank the Lord who has given me a relatively high IQ and EQ which make me successful in my studies and my job. Yet there was always a feeling that I was missing out on life. I sure was during the times I was wandering in my own mind and drowning in my own thoughts and feelings!
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1 comment:
Halleluiah … Halleluiah …. and it “clicked” ….
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